A Women, a Mother and a Professional
When I was a kid, my mother would always say these two things.
“You will understand what all it takes to nurture a kid when you will become a mother”“Beta be financially independent” no matter what.
Mom, you were so right!Thanks for all the hard work that you and Dad had put in to raise me. Thanks for always believing in me and supporting me. Love you both.
Yes, Moment the child is born; a mother is born! Life doesn’t change much when you get married but it certainly does when this beautiful phase of “Motherhood” embraces life. It’s indeed till date has been the happiest moment of my life.
You might have heard this phrase before that “which cannot be said should not be said”. I cannot resonate and relate more than to it, then now. There is so much to share, write & express but I know that emotions and moments cannot be penned down and even if they could – they would certainly get lost in midst of expressions and diction, so to say.Hence I am just writing down which I felt would get close to what I feel though much more was experienced in this journey.
Tussle between Family and Career: You are at your peak of your career and you have to manage both family and career.
You have entered into the phase of motherhood where your child needs time than anything else but simultaneously you have to manage your career. This is certainly not easy. The option is with us.
Many give up. I decided not to. After all it’s a personal choice and for me both Family and Career were of high importance. It is easy for people who decided to pursue just one path. For me work and family goes hand in hand. How can you take care of your baby when you are not happy, when your mind isn’t stimulated, when you are not pursuing your dreams, your career?
Loving yourself -I always believed it is very important to love oneself in order to love others. You may not agree with me. That’s ok J. But do ponder. Try something which you really enjoy. Just do that and you would feel so good. You feel energised. Now whatever you do, you would do it with much more interest and great zeal.
However, this joy doesn’t come so easy. It requires discipline, it demands you to stretch, it requires PASSION. In an endeavour to attain this bliss, I gave up many things or I would say I wanted to invest my time in things that were more important.
Yes, I watched movie after almost 2 years in a theatre:) . Not that I couldn’t have gone but something else was more important. Yes, it is my baby who is more important. Therefore, I decided to spend more with him. My baby was not a responsibility for me but a sheer joy and blessing. The fact is that "responsibility", the very word, has to be broken into two words. It means "response ability". And response is possible only if you are spontaneous, here and now. Response means that your attention, your awareness, your consciousness, is totally here and now, in the present. So whatever happens, you respond with your whole being.
Being in a nuclear family when you don’t have much support, one has to manage a lot. Thanks to those innate multi-tasking capabilities and little management capabilities. Have been able to do justice at both Career and Family. Touchwood!
Things don’t come in a platter often. You have to make efforts; you have to put in lot of hard work. After all, you are pursuing your dreams.
The “ME” Time- In the midst of all this marathon, don’t forget to pamper yourself. I ensured that whenever I could steal moments for only myself, I did. Whether it is going for a window shopping, beauty parlour or freaking out with your friends for a quick break. Thanks to my better half for allowing me to be myself and doing some part time baby sitting on weekends. J .
The Rush Hour- Every morning in that 70-90 mins, I have to complete multiple things starting from preparing 3-4 meals for baby, packing his day care bag, making him ready for office and finally getting ready myself. Every time I think how did I do this? But I have been able to do this till now J
The biggest Support- God finds a way for everyone. For me it came in a form of My office Day Care. This has been a biggest support for me till date. I could focus on work in office only because I knew that my baby is right there just few steps away from me. Whenever I want, I can go and see him, talk to him, play with him.
The most important aspect- Your understanding with your partner has a significant difference in this entire journey. It is not about your individual careers or responsibilities but it is all about perceiving it collectively and managing this as a whole.
There would be times when you would feel stressed, exhausted, even frustrated. It’s ok. It’s absolutely normal. Take deep breath, give yourself a pat on your back and get back again with a smile.With time it will make you more patient, calm and loving.
Closing Notes: Try this! Everyday nature gives us two options. One to be sad all day and other to be happy…..the choice is obvious and will always be.
******Will write a book someday, this is just a page of the entire story********